When an expectant woman’s mother-in-law ruined her gender reveal and then lied about it, the mom-to-be didn’t take it lying down. Instead, she got even. With many members of their family looking on, the daughter-in-law quickly made her mother-in-law regret her actions. Was she wrong for the way she handled the alleged disrespect? You decide.
After an unnamed woman’s mother-in-law allegedly ruined her gender reveal and lied about it, she wasted no time exposing the matriarch right in front of their family. After “embarrassing” her mother-in-law, the mom-to-be seemed to question whether or not she had done the right thing, so she took to the Reddit thread “Am I the A**hole” to ask what the name implies, but first, she gave the background to the story.
According to user u/Fit_Tough1697, she didn’t want a gender reveal party but caved after her husband’s family made a big deal about it. Unfortunately, her mother-in-law, who we’ll call “Pam” for the simplicity of storytelling, was convinced the mom-to-be, who we’ll call “Lauren,” knew the gender and insisted that she tell her. However, according to Lauren, she had no idea. “She was convinced that I knew the gender and insisted I tell her. I told her I didn’t know,” she wrote.
Sadly, Pam didn’t believe her. Instead, she allegedly continued to pester Lauren until she finally wore the mom-to-be down. After a month of Pam bothering Lauren about the baby’s gender and promising she wouldn’t tell anyone, Lauren told Pam she was having a girl just to shut her up. “I figured it was a 50/50 chance and it would get [her] off my back,” Lauren admitted, adding that the entire exchange took place via texts.
When the big day came, Lauren and her husband cut the gender-reveal cake to reveal blue insides after which “there was a really awkward silence,” Lauren recalled. Very quickly, it became evident what had happened. “She had told literally all of the guests from her side of the family so they could bring appropriate gifts,” Lauren revealed. As family and friends gathered around to congratulate the couple on their son, Pam allegedly “came over and hissed” at Lauren, saying her daughter-in-law had “made her look stupid.”
That’s when Lauren decided to remind Pam that she had promised not to tell anyone, and had she kept her word, she wouldn’t have been humiliated. When Pam adamantly denied ever making such a promise, Lauren whipped out her phone with the incriminating texts. “I showed her our text conversation,” Lauren admitted, adding that some of their family was “right there” when she exposed her mother-in-law’s lies. They got to hear Pam admit that she not only lied but “had never intended to keep that promise.”
“She said that it was a dick move and that I only did it to embarrass her,” Lauren wrote. “I again reminded her that [I] had told her on multiple occasions that I did not know the gender,” she continued before concluding on the conundrum she found herself in following the ordeal. “My husband wants me to apologize to keep the peace. I probably will but I don’t think I was an a**hole like she seems to think,” Lauren explained to readers on the forum.
Although Lauren admitted to “lying” to her mother-in-law, readers decided she was “not the a**hole” in the situation. Instead, most commenters felt that her mother-in-law was guilty of spoiling the special day, as well as trying to cover her tracks by lying about it, and they urged Lauren to stand her ground and not apologize, according to the NY Post.
“I’m sick of people being told they should apologize when they did nothing wrong in order to keep the peace. Being forced to appease bullies/people who break boundaries is harmful,” one of the top comments read.
A second person wrote: “I hate that the husband wants the original poster to apologize. She’s literally the wronged person here who was harassed and lied to. Husband needs to tell his mother to do the apologizing.”
And a third said, “She embarrassed herself. ‘I’m sorry you embarrassed yourself by lying’ is about the only apology I’d be willing to give.”
And someone else echoed this and suggested the poster give a ‘fauxpology’. “Say you’re sorry you felt you had no other choice to get her off your case or tell her you’re sorry she feels embarrassed that she broke her promise.”
“Not in the wrong, but you and your husband need to get on the same page about her behavior ASAP,” someone else concluded.
Indeed, if there can only be one a**hole in this situation, it seems to be the lying mother-in-law. However, two wrongs don’t make a right, and both women lied, taking an already apparently tense situation and making it worse. If I can give Lauren any advice, it wouldn’t be about who was “wrong,” but rather how to prevent such disrespect in the future. Stop trying to appease this woman, set firm boundaries, and always stick to the truth. If it’s too difficult to send an honest reply, it’s often better to say nothing at all.