After a social media influencer shared what she thought was proper birthday dinner etiquette, she was quickly ripped apart over her controversial opinion, with some critics calling it “unfair.” Do you agree?
Christina Najjar, a 33-year-old California social media influencer better known as “Tinx” on Instagram and TikTok, raised a stink online when she decided to discuss what she believed was proper birthday dinner etiquette in a TikTok video. After hearing what Najjar had to say, opinions were divided, and a debate over her controversial opinion ensued, with some calling it “unfair.” But first, the backstory.
It all began after Sean Lans, another TikTok content creator, shared an experience that resulted in a friend becoming upset with him. To make a long story short, Sean didn’t attend a friend’s birthday dinner because his friend had chosen an expensive restaurant that Sean couldn’t afford. Because he was “broke,” Sean chose to skip dinner, meeting up to celebrate afterward instead, but his friend got “mad” at him for not attending the pricey meal, as he explained in the clip below.
@seanie2blondie Restaurants in new york are so expensive in general it’s actually crazy #nyc #birthdaydinner #storytime #gay #expensive #broke #fyp
After Sean expressed that he thought it was “unfair” for someone to choose “a really expensive restaurant” for a birthday dinner, people began sounding off in the comments, and some agreed with his assessment, at least in part. Overall, the consensus seemed to be that his birthday-having buddy could decide how they wanted to celebrate, but it was unfair for Sean’s friend to get upset with those who couldn’t afford to go.
Some even suggested that “friends who make you feel bad for being tight on money are not your friends.” However, Christina Najjar had a different opinion entirely, which she didn’t hesitate to express in a video of her own. Stitching her clip with Sean’s, Najjar explained that it was her opinion that the birthday person should pay for everyone’s dinner during their special celebration, as the NY Post reported.
@tinx #stitch with @Sean Lans
“If you invite a person to a restaurant of your choosing for your birthday, you should pay for everybody,” Najjar declared as she aired what has been called her “inflammatory etiquette opinion” to her millions of followers on TikTok, where the Los Angeles resident posts under the handle @Tinx. “I know that is going to be deeply unpopular, but I just think that you can’t pick a restaurant and ask people to come and celebrate you and pay for themselves.”
Najjar also suggested that it was especially ridiculous that some peer groups expect the guests to “split the cost of the birthday person’s food,” the Post reported. “If I invite a group of people somewhere to celebrate me, that’s my treat. I organized it, and I’m expecting them to come,” she concluded. “To pick an expensive restaurant and expect everybody to pay, and in this person’s case, then get pissy when they say, ‘I’m sorry, I can’t afford that,’ is really bad manners.”
Unsurprisingly, it didn’t take long for Christina Najjar’s clip to go viral as opinions were divided, sparking controversy and debate. Critics of her stance claimed that, according to traditional birthday etiquette in the United States, the birthday person is to be treated and shouldn’t have to pay at all, let alone pay for their guests. Others said the cost was the responsibility of the host, who happened to be the birthday person in this case.
“I would never let MY friend pay for ME on THEIR birthday ever,” one detractor wrote before asking, “What kind of friends would allow that?” Others agreed, saying Najjar had a “crazy take” on birthday etiquette. At least one commenter even accused the influencer of thinking the way she did because she’s “rich” since it could be presumed that she’d foot the bill for everyone’s dinner on her special day.
Of course, there were also those who shared the influencer’s opinion, with one defender claiming, “This is actual proper etiquette, but I find younger generations don’t abide by this.” Another agreed, saying, “This is how I was raised—it feels strange to ask people to pay on my birthday!” Similarly, some alleged that what was proper depended on a person’s culture and upbringing. But, regardless of where your opinion lies, a lesson can be learned here.
Many commenters seemed to agree on at least one point, which was frequently expressed in the comments on Sean’s original video. In short, a person can decide how they want to celebrate their birthday, including whether they will treat their friends to a meal or expect everyone to “go Dutch.” However, they should be understanding if there is a cost and someone can’t afford it. Simply put, a friendly and honest discussion about the plans, paired with basic grace and understanding, could alleviate a lot of hurt feelings and potential embarrassment.
