After a girl hit a boy, the school punished her for it. However, when her mom found out the truth, she became extremely angry.
Being a parent isn’t easy. We must teach our children to be kind, independent, responsible, and compassionate, while also knowing when to stand up and support our kids against other authorities, who think they are instilling those values but are dead wrong. That’s exactly what happened when one mother found out that her daughter was being punished at school.
The angry mother shared the details in a user-submitted story on “Not Always Right,” explaining the chain of events that unfolded after her daughter was punished for punching a male classmate. While the story is unconfirmed, it carries a message that’s undeniably important just the same. Although we often say violence isn’t the answer, there are instances where self-defense is required. However, is this story one of them?
The mother, a nurse who we’ll call Pam, was working her shift in the Emergency Room when she received a call from her daughter’s school. She was told that there was an incident involving her daughter and that she needed to come into the school. “Is she ill or injured? Can it wait until my shift is over in two hours?” Pam asked. She was told that her daughter had “struck another student” and that they had been trying to call her for 45 minutes.
“It really is very serious,” the teacher added during the call. So, Pam went to the school, where she was ushered into the principal’s office. There waited her daughter, along with her advisor, the male teacher, the principal, a boy with blood around his nose and a red face, and his parents. As she entered, the teacher told Pam it was kind of her to “finally join us.”
“Yeah, things get busy in the ER. I’ve spent the last hour administering over 40 stitches to a seven-year-old who was beaten by his mother with a metal ladle and then I had to deal with the police regarding the matter. Sorry for the inconvenience,” she responded.
After the teacher did his best to act as though he wasn’t embarrassed by Pam’s remark, he began to tell her what happened. Pam learned that the boy snapped her daughter’s bra, and her child proceeded to punch the young man in the face twice for it. Listening, Pam “got the impression they were more angry with my daughter than the boy.” As the teacher finished, Pam asked, “Oh. And, you want to know if I’m going to press charges against him for sexually assaulting my daughter and against the school for allowing him to do it?”
Everyone in the room got jittery when she mentioned sexual assault, and they all started to speak at once. “I don’t think it was that serious,” the teacher told her while the advisor said, “Let’s not over-react,” as the principal chimed in, “I think you’re missing the point,” and the boy’s mother began to cry before Pam’s daughter recalled what had happened in front of the group.
“He kept snapping my bra. I asked him to stop but he didn’t, so I told Mr. [Teacher]. He told me to ‘ignore it.’ [Boy] did it again and undid my bra so I hit him. Then he stopped,” Pam’s daughter explained, according to her mother who redacted the names of those involved.
“You let him do this? Why didn’t you stop him? Come over here and let me touch the front of your trousers,” Pam demanded of the teacher. “Does that seem inappropriate to you? Why don’t you go and pull on Mrs. [Advisor]’s bra right now? See how fun it is for her. Or on that boy’s mother’s bra. Or mine. You think just because they’re kids it’s fun?”
The principal tried to remind Pam, “with all due respect,” that her daughter “still beat another child.” But, Pam wasn’t buying it. “No. She defended herself against a sexual attack from another pupil,” she said, pointing out that the male student was a foot taller than her daughter and twice as heavy. “How many times should she have let him touch her?” she asked. “If the person who was supposed to help and protect her in a classroom couldn’t be bothered, what should she have done? He pulled her bra so hard it came undone,” she continued.
“I’m taking her home. I think the boy has learned his lesson,” Pam added, saying she hoped that “nothing like this ever happens again” to her daughter or any other girl at this school. “You wouldn’t let him do it to a member of staff so what makes you think he can do it to a girl of 15 is beyond me,” she said before turning to the boy and telling him, “And, if you ever touch my daughter again, I will have you arrested for sexual assault.”
While everyone agrees that the boy should keep his hands to himself, some don’t think what he did should be labeled sexual assault since that seems to minimize the severity of other instances of more invasive, more violent acts. Regardless of what we call it, the girl had the right to stop the unwanted touching, and most believe that, if anyone should be punished in this situation, it’s the teacher who allowed the touching to continue, ultimately causing events to escalate as the young lady was forced to resort to violence in order to get her peer’s hands off of her undergarments. She should have hit the teacher, too.