‘You’re Done!’: Homeowner Laughs As Porch Pirate’s Escape Is Thwarted

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After a homeowner confronted a porch pirate who was stealing packages from his doorstep, the thief tried to escape. Unfortunately for him, things didn’t go as planned. The homeowner couldn’t stop laughing, saying, “Yep, you’re done!” and it was all caught on video.

Porch pirate attempting to flee (Credit: YouTube)

Porch pirates are the absolute worst, and their repeated attempts at one residence caused the homeowner to install security cameras that would alert him when someone was at his door. Many criminals commit a crime on the fly, but this porch thief did not consider that his getaway vehicle was not reliable when it comes to certain weather conditions.

As seen in video footage of the incident, the homeowner opened his door just as the thief turned to flee. The porch pirate runs down the driveway toward his small compact car as the homeowner informs him, “Yep, you’re done!” The thief says something back that sounds like, “gotta catch me first,” probably thinking he was going to make a clean getaway.

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Porch thief stuck in a snowbank (left), Trying to dig his tires out (right) (Credit: YouTube)

The thief, who is now in his car, puts the vehicle in reverse and flew backward out of the driveway — right into a snowbank. He pumped the gas, but his tires only spun. The homeowner calmly remained on his doorstep watching it all. “Yea, you’re done. The cops are on the way,” he said. Panicked, the porch pirate hopped out of the car and tried digging the snow away, to no avail.

The homeowner, who is filming, waits for the cops as the thief continues to literally “spin his wheels.” A few comical minutes go by as the thief gets in and out of his car to dig at the snow. “Want me to get you a shovel?” the homeowner asks while laughing. “I’ll get you a shovel!” The car engine is roaring and the video continues as the thief attempts to push the car.

Porch pirate gets arrested (Credit: YouTube)

However, all he accomplishes is blowing his vehicle’s horn, bringing more attention to his crime. The homeowner gives the porch thief some advice. “It’s front-wheel drive… you need to get the wheels on the ground,” he explains. The thief, who is exhausted at this point, responds with something inaudible. “Just forget it, the police are on the way,” the homeowner advises.

The cops arrive, but the porch pirate remains seated in his car. “Get out of the car!” the police command before they have to yank him out of the vehicle. “Put your hands up!” According to the Toronto Sun, “Police attended the scene for a theft call and a 33-year-old Brampton resident was arrested and charged with one count of fraud under $5,000 and one count of theft under $5,000.”

In another incident that took place in sunny California, where the weather conditions were optimal, a porch pirate nevertheless got caught by the homeowner, who was waiting for a moment like this. Ring video captured a woman walking up to the front door of Shirah Booker’s Long Beach house and taking a letter left on top of the mailbox.

“A porch pirate was caught on video in front of a home in Long Beach, and the homeowner who caught the suspect red-handed says she wanted to make sure that woman knew she was being watched,” ABC News reported. “When I opened the app, I see her grabbing the letter and it was kind of one of those moments like, ‘Oh, you got the right one today!'” Booker laughed.

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Shirah Booker confronts porch pirate (Credit: YouTube)

Booker was in bed around 11:30 a.m. Thursday when she got an alert from her security system’s motion detectors. When she heard the chime a second time, she realized someone was at her front door. “I kind of opened the door a little quietly ’cause I want to catch her in the act. I don’t want her to run. I need you to know I’m coming,” Booker said.

“For the most part, I think of myself to be calm, cool, and collected, but sometimes you do have to get a little rice crispy and snap, crackle and pop,” Booker explained. “People need to know you’re not the one to mess with.” Booker confronted the woman and a scuffle ensued as the African-American homeowner got the best of the porch pirate.

The mother of three says she has taken self-defense training and felt like she had control over the porch pirate. She wasn’t afraid. “I’m just over it. It’s like a point for the good guy finally,” Booker said, adding that only part of her name explains how she handled the situation. “There was no ‘shyness’ at all but it was ‘book-her,’ I did get her!”

The suspected porch pirate didn’t end up taking anything. Booker said she got everything back, even the stamp from her envelope, which was a thank you card from someone who attended an autism event that Booker hosted. She posted on social media, “You may wanna think twice about stealing from my house. Just FYI—I see everything!”